When Canadian upstart, Moose, spent a couple of months on an island off the south coast of Australia last Christmas getting secret surf refinement lessons from the mastersurfinstructor, The Mexican, she kept it a secret to avoid being mobbed by adoring fans. "Can you imagine if the word got out", said the Mex, "the beach would have been swarming with bodies and the island would have slipped off the continental shelf into the Southern Ocean."
(Moose receiving instruction on the finer points of surfing from The Mexican)
Fortunately, word of Moose's secret training sessions didn't get out until after she had left the island. Apparently one of Moose's biggest fans is 10 time world champion and the greatest athlete who ever lived, Kelly Slater. Moose's mum has sent the Mexican a Canadian surfing magazine with an advert showing the great man surfing on the secret island on the back cover, soon after Moose had left the island.
(Kelly Slater on the back cover of a Candian surf magazine)
Rumour has it that the great man begged his sponsors to place the advert in the hope of getting noticed by Moose, who it is believed is now back in Canada. Kelly has been a fan since first reading the Oldfartsurfer's stories of her surfing prowess and exploits south of the equator last summer. Apparently, he had private investigators chase down her location and when he found out he made the trip south to see if he could impress. Photographic evidence of Slater on the island appeared on the front cover of Australian Surfing Life stating the date it was taken as 20th March. Unfortunately for Kelly, Moose had already left the island by this date.
(Slater on 20th March)
"The photo on the Canadian back cover and the Australian front cover are identical" said Moose's mum, "the placement of the photo in both magazines is an obvious ploy by Kelly to get my daughter's attention". The Mexican defended Slater's actions saying " he's not stalking her or anything, he's just a big fan". Kelly was pretty cool getting towed into some massive waves and he is quoted as saying "towing good waves is surfing's equivalent to a hot woman feeding your grapes". "We're still analysing that" said the Mex, "we are not sure if he means surfing without towing is the equivalent of eating grapes or the equivalent of a hot woman". Either way, as the Dude would say "we need to do more research".
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