CrossEyed & Painless, Live at Tom Price 1981

The Oldfartsurafer recently received a surprise package in the mail from Rouge (OFSC No. 45) containing a CD rarity - the 30th Anniversary edition and rremastered version of the infamous Live at Tom Price 1981 concert of West Aussie legends CrossEyed & Painless.  No explanation or covering note was proffered, however, this is one of the rarest and most unique recordings ever made.  Fans of the CrossEyes liken the Live at Tom Price 1981 recording  to The Shane's "Live at the Duke Vols 1 & 2" which celebrated the Mexican's (OFSC No. 4) 50th and the yet unheard Montague Street Back Shed recording of Cheech & Chong, the Nine Inch Nail and ex members of both The Shane's (Mex) and the CrossEyes (Rouge).  The uniqueness of the"Tom Price 81" album (as it is reverently referred to) is that it was recorded before CDs & MP3 players were invented.

According to the liner notes "If you happened to call into Tom Price pub in 1981, you might recall seeing 4 guys who travelled from Paraburdoo on Friday nights to play in the lounge bar.  Named after the Talking Heads album, the guys were a raw passionate acoustic combo, with a driving conga percussionist."  Rouge provided vocals, Bolero Acoustic 12 string and harp and the congas were provided by Chris De Burgh before he paid the ferryman instead of the lady in red.

(CrossEyed & Painless, circa 1981, Rouge on the bottom right)

The original recording was mixed live in 1981 by Ernie (who drove a fast milk cart out west) and recorded directly to a Maxell C-90 tape.  The old tape was discovered in a garage clean out in 2010 and skillfully remastered by Rouge using a Boss Digital Recorder BR-600,just in time for the 30th Anniversary.

The CrossEyes are gifted musicians who gave their own interpretation to classic modern songs of the time including songs by the Ozarks, Dire Straits, Taj Mahal, Talking Heads and Neil Young as well as an original by band member Wil Cuperus I'm OK, You're OK.  It is so good that tts hard to pick a highlight from the album, but the Little Feet Classic, Willin', stands out along with Neil Young's Cinnamon Girl.  The Tom Price 81 album presents a raw live performance in a mining town pub in outback Australia.  Pub music in Australia is about as good as it gets and this album is the next best thing to being there back in 81.

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Spot & Moose Redefine Mavericks

After conquering Canada, popular oldfartsurfers Spot (OFSC No. 6) and Moose (OFSC No. 5) heard there was a big swell headed towards Mavericks.   Spot was keen to take off behind the peak on some 20' bombs and Moose was keen to show her new big wave style.

(Huntington Beach)

Our team landed in LA and asked the local cab driver to take them to the big surf.  "He dropped us off at Huntington Pier" said Spot, "there was a bit of a ripple so we shot (from) the pier."  "It was really cool" said Moose.

(Venice Beach)

"After Huntington we hitched to Venice Beach for a romantic pre-Mavericks sunset" said Moose.  "That really set the mood for what was to come."  They got so moody in fact the then decided a detour via a Chateau Montelena.

(Chateau Montelena)

"We liked the wine so much we thought we might buy the Chateau" said Spot.  Moose said "the Chateau Montelena 1973 Chardonnay was exquisite and we spent the afternoon sculling down two bottles of the beautiful stuff".  "In the end we decided not to buy the Chateau because it had a really stupid philosophy of 'making best period' - go figure, I think the best period is the one we are in now" said Moose.  "Although it could get better" suggested Spot.  Quietly they both agreed that the pinot noirs didn't hold up to the Winstead pinot 1994.

(Spot at redefines Mavericks)

After sculling the two bottles of 73 Chardonnay and gorging on cheese Spot and Moose slept soundly and prepared their minds to take on Mavericks the next day.  There has been no further word on how they tackled the great wave although rumour has it that Spot has changed perceptions on what real surfing is in waves of consequence.

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Rouge's Tour of the South Coast

It seems that the oldfartsurfers are striking out on surf tours all over the globe.  Not only did Mex and the Dude hit the wild west coast, but simultaniously, oldfartsurfer Rouge (OFSC No. 45) hit the soulful south coast.  So soulful in fact that he wasn't content with just a weekend but got right into the local oldfartsurfing culture and decided to stay for a fortnight.

(south coast soul, you could stay for a fortnight)

 "Just back from two weeks on the soulful south coast" writes Rouge, "so many surf spots its easy to find an uncrowded wave".  "I had two surfs a day for two weeks, fittest I have been in years, hope I can preserve some for Easter"  he says.  Easter! That's right, another tour of the secret island to the south.  "We've been trying to keep it a secret" said OFSC Head Honcho, Mex, "but the word is starting to leak out."  The surf is predicted to be epic and the beer will be fresh on tap.  When the Dude heard the news, all he could say was "its still Christmas long service leave, go back and do some more research". 

(Superfit Rouge showing his south coast soul style)

Apparently Rouge has started a an old fart movement on the south coast as according to a secret source there are "lots of classic style surfers, with several guys riding single fin 9' boards, half a dozen SUPs and a couple of kneelos".  The Mexican welcomed the news as " wonderful, I hope they're all still stoked".
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2nd Annual Invasion Day Tour of the West Coast

The Mex (OFSC No. 4) spent the evening of the eve of the 2nd Annual Invasion Day Tour of the West Coast packing and double checking that all things surf were in the back of his trusty Subaru.  "I didn't want to get there and find I'd left my wet suit behind or something stupid like that" said the Mex.  Creature comforts were considered secondary but he did manage to pack an air mattress to protect his aged bones from the cold hard ground under the tent floor.  he was packing the night before as its a five hour drive to the west coast and the boys wanted to get away early to enjoy an afternoon's surf in the predicted 2m swell and offshore easterlies. 

(Evening Stroll, Day 1)

Mex arrived outside The Dude's (OFSC No. 12) palace at 7:30 am to find the surfing stalwart almost comatose in a chair in the driveway.  "What's up?" asked Mex concerned for his fellow surfing tourist.  "Moo Flu" groaned The Dude.  Mex loaded the suffering Dude into the trusty Subaru and they began the 2nd Invasion Day Tour. As the journey progressed the Dude slowly came round and it turns out that he has a secret life as one of society's most sought after avante garde authorities on fine art and was invited to the VIP opening of MONA, the art worlds newest and greatest private art gallery.  The gallery owner, a private billionaire, had sought the Dude's personal advice on his collection.  "This was to affirm his personal art choices to boost his expensive ego in preparation for potentially soul crushing bitchy reviews from art critics who think there isn't enough pink in today's art collections" said the Dude.  It turns out that the Dude was pretty impressed with the gallery saying "it wasn't just the free Verve and Moo Brew that I was impressed with, I told him he got the mix right as there were lots of rude bits, macabre images and inexplicable sculptures thrown in to bamboozle the public and con the critics."  "My favourite was the little dudes hanging out in the building services as living art, and, don't forget the poo machine, which I was told by the owner, managed to drop one every hour" he said.  The Dude's conclusion, "definitely better than the Guggenheim in Bilbao".

(Dawn Day 2)

The boys arrived at the coast early afternoon on Day 1 only to find that the wind had inexplicably turned onshore.  They surfed a small fat alternative alternative that was protected from the wind, the Mex even managed to make a complete nit of himself on Sammy the SUP while the Dude dosed his Moo Flu with a bit of salt water.  That evening a counter meal of fresh flake at the local pub washed down by a couple of beers and the boys couldn't wait for it to get dark so they could get to sleep early and get up fresh for a surf the next day.  The Mex thought he had packed a single air mattress, however, when he pumped it up it turned out to be a double which covered the whole tent.  Not wanting to appear too cosy, the boys top an tailed their sleeping bags, however, as they tried to settle for the night they discovered just how unstable an air mattress can be with two people on it.  A small movement by one person causes the mattress to bounce anyone else on it.  So the boys tried to sleep and not move.  The Dude did find one advantage of the mattress though, "whenever the Mex started snoring I just bounced the mattress till he stopped" he said.  "It was very effective".

(Duck diving a big fat one)

Dawn on Day 2 and the boys were into a 2m west swell and off shore breeze.  A couple of two hour sessions each and they were knackered.  "The waves were big enough to give you a nice drop and a bit of speed but fat enough to make it easy for the oldfartsurfers to paddle in to" said the Mex.  "Just perfect" said the Dude over a post surf cuppa tea.

(Fans arrive by sea and by land)

The third day was forecast to be onshore and raining so the oldfartsurfers packed up and drove home for a comfy mattress and the good women.  "Another successful tour for the oldfartsurfers" said the Mex.  "I could get used to this".  "More research" said the Dude.

(The lefts were the best)

(West Coast Nessy the kelp monster, soon to be seen rotting art at MONA)

(Two lefts)

(Oldfartsurfers prefer big fat peaks)

(Team wave, sharing and caring)

(The Dude recovering from Moo Flu and a couple of big sessions)

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The Dude & Mex Paddle into the Offshore Wind

The Dude (OFSC No. 12) and the Mexican (OFSC No. 4) scored some big time offshore winds on a recent sojourn to the east coast.  "The wind was so strong that we could easily have been blown to the Land of the Long White Cloud" said the Dude, "we could have had lamb for lunch!"

(Blowin' exhaust plumes)

"My contact lenses were blown to the back of my eyeballs" said the Mex through extremely bloodshot eyes, stinging from the salt spray.  "The beauty of it was that we got lots of paddling practice, particularly as the waves were fat and hard to paddle into" he said putting a positive spin on the experience.

 The Dude had a different perspective on the positive aspects of the surf saying "the highlight of this magic little session was the colour of the water and the bright sunlight".

(An attractive peak down the beach)

(Plenty of paddling practice into the wind on fat waves)

(Slotted in a frothy one)

(Perfect conditions, fat closeouts with 30knots of offshore breeze)

The Old Farts Surf Co. Fabulous Tour of Coolangatta - Day 6

The Dude (Oldfartsurfer No. 12) and Mexican (Oldfartsurfer No. 4) jumped out of bed at first light to check the surf, despite tired muscles from extensive tour surfing and sore heads, from extensive tour beer research.  (Of course there were to be no secrets on this tour, no "what happens on tour stays on tour", as the boys were accompanied by the good ladies, keeping a lid wild oldfartsurfer behaviour.)  When the sun finally rose over the superbank on the sixth and final day of the Old Farts Surf Co. Fabulous Tour of Coolangatta it revealed clean glassy 1' swell  peeling perfectly around the point.  The Mexican was tempted to grab Bob the Bobsled and slip out before the Saturday crowd arrived.  "I thought there might be a wave with enough grunt to push me and Bob along" said Mex, "but the Dude was doubtful and suggested there might  be more grunt if we went back to bed for a while".

(Sunrise on Day 6, perfect glassy 1' superbank)

After a bit more of a nap, the oldfartsurfers and the good ladies woke to a leisurely breakfast and a bit of chat.  The oldfartsurfers were distracted and couldn't keep their eyes off the superbank in case the swell suddenly jacked up. A rise in the swell wasn't predicted so it was just wishful thinking.

(Glassy conditions on the inside section of the superbank)

After breakfast the team packed up and put their bags in storage.  Of course boardies were put on top, just in case that swell did rise.  Then the team went for a leisurely walk around to Duranbah, on the State border with NSW at Tweed Heads.

(Saturday morning crowd gathers at the superbank)

On the walk around to Duranbah there was plenty of action on the superbank.  "There were some great team waves with about six surfers on each wave"  said the Dude,  "it was pretty amazing for such small waves, a testament to the quality of the wave."

(A six surfer team wave at the superbank)

Once the team reached Duranbah they stopped for a latte' in a lovely cafe' on the top of the hill.  The Cafe' had an art gallery out the back so a full morning's entertainment was complete with a browse of the artwork.  We were pretty pleased with this little find" said the Mex, "I think it was the high point of the tour for the Good Ladies, and their last memory of the Tour was what made if so fabulous".

(This kid scores one to himself)

The lady running the gallery was keen to leave the rat race of Coolangatta and the Gold Coast for the secret island home of the oldfartsufers.  The Mex filled her in on some good spots as long as she kept it a secret from the hordes.  "Made me appreciate how good we have it at home" said Mex, "We can still get six on a wave on a good day, even though we have less people and its really cold this time of year, its fantastic, you have to leave home to appreciate how good it is". 

(The kid gets slotted, while predators on the shoulder wait for him to fall)

"We'll have to do some more research for the next Old Farts Surf Co. Tour" said the Dude as he and the Good Woman jumped on the plane and left the Mex and the Good Lady to find Spot.

(Two for the price of one, tandem ladies surfing on the wave of the day)

(Duranbah, had enough grunt to support about 10 surfers on one wave)

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Spot, Moose's Mum and the Moose

Never being a man to shy away from a challenge, Spot (Oldfartsurfer No. 6) left the southern hemisphere at the end of November so he could catch the massive winter swells on the West Coast of Canada.  "I get so bored surfing in warm water" said Spot, "I need the danger of losing whole limbs to frost bite or killer whales, and Canada has all that thrill for me".  Of course his sojourn to the arctic north has nothing to do with catching up with Canadian upstart Moose (Oldfartsurfer No. 5).  Moose, of course, has promised to look after Spot and is trying to keep him away from Vancouver Island's big wave spots.  She has even tried distracting him by introducing him to the sport of curling.  "Spot thought he was going to be riding the curl" said Moose laughing, "but instead he found himself hurling 100kg lumps of granite across an ice rink".  Spot was positive about it saying "at least it help me bulk up the muscles for when I hit those big slabs off the coast"

(Moose teaching Spot how to ride the curl)

In order to distract Spot from his biggest rival, Kelly Slater, Moose's Mum (Oldfartsurfer No. 33), took spot on an expedition into the Rockies to toughen him up and prepare him for his big wave destiny.

(Spot sliding into some mountainous waves in the Rockies)

"I thought I could get him sliding into some mountain waves to get him acclimatised to the temperature before he hit the big liquid waves of the North Pacific" said Mouse's Mum.  "We also thought we could distract him from chasing Moose during the day" she said.  The distraction was only short lived, however, and Spot, with all the skill of an experienced hunter, managed to track down a real Moose.  "A poor substitute for a killer whale" said Spot, "but it still gave me that buzz from the potential of losing a limb when I snowboarded between its legs".

(The real moose Spot tracked down in the Rockies)

The last reports of Spot, Moose's Mum and the Moose were that they were doing altitude training in board shorts and tee-shirts on the highest peaks of the Rockies.  The Old Farts Surf Co. is sponsoring the training session by providing gingernut snap biscuits and good coffee.

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